'Twas the night before Easter

And all through the flat, my tummy was rumbling because it had no fat.

Not entirely true.  I'm still pretty pudgy, but none the less feeling like my old self.  Well it's Saturday evening here in surprisingly sunny England (for a change) and I'm where I was when I started Lent, my girlfriends flat in Sheffield.

I am looking forward to tomorrow quite a lot, but I am more interested to see how I handle things after lent has ended.  I just got through watching Iron Man for the first time (not bad - sorta) and in it he wants an "American Cheeseburger" and they give him a cheap ass Burger king Cheese burger.  The kind wrapped in paper.

Now, that got me salivating right away.  I want an American Cheeseburger.  Can I haz cheezeburger? 

I hope not.

Everyone tells me "Wow, you must have great will power".  Possibly, but we'll see what tomorrow brings!.

As for tomorrow, I'll post an, erm, post in the morning as we are heading over to my girlfriends parents for Sunday dinner, so I'll get weighed there and take a few pictures to put up for my final official Lent 2009 post.  You'll get to know how much weight I have lost exactly and see a good old before and after picture.

Not Long Now!

Well, here it is, the last few days of Lent!

It's quite strange to think that it's almost over, doesn't seem like almost 6 and half weeks ago since I started.

I got my hair chopped today which was something I promised myself I would get done for Easter.  It was almost a year since I last had a hair cut so it is quite odd to have short short hair again.  I hope having it cut hasn't lost me my strength!

My housemate, Vicki, and I were having a chat about the end of lent as she has been doing it too, even though she isn't religious she wanted to see what it was like to do it.  She mentioned she was worried about Lent being over soon.  I know what she means.  It's odd to think what it will be like eating the foods you have given up for what seems like a long time.  I told her it is a little odd at first.  Eating something you haven't been eating through choice feels 'wrong' as your brain puts up a sort of mental block when you get offered / go to eat something on the no no list.

The first few times are almost a novelty, take for instance eating toast (as we have both given up bread as part of Lent).  The first time is almost a novelty because you don't actually want / need it but you have some anyway.  The next time is kind of a continuation of that.  And the third time usually goes like this...

You want some toast.  Then you realise you can have some.  So you get all giddy that you can actually have it so you do!  This might sound odd but it's true.  Lent usually lingers on a good while after it has ended but it really makes wanting something and then having it seem so much more outstanding.

Well, there are just 3 more sleeps to go until my first cup of coffee in 6.5 weeks and also a Sunday dinner with meat and gravy.  The Sunday dinner will be nice, but I'm not craving it at all.  Just the Coffee.

MMM!

Last Week!

Oo-er.

What a time of it I have been having lately.  I have had a lot of lent dreams, but they are so subtle that I only remember them days after having them and get very confused.  I had one a few days back where I broke lent a few hours before it ended.  I have also had a mirage of dreams about eating stuff I shouldn't.  So confusing.

Well, as you have noticed, I haven't been posting any shopping pictures lately.  The reason is that I have been doing little bits of food shopping here and there so haven't really got one big picture to put up.

I got 'properly weighed' and tested last Wednesday and had quite a shock.  In a good way.  I'll be posting all the gory details next Sunday which, of course, is Easter Sunday.  It's a bit shocking.

As far as temptation goes, I really wanted a beer yesterday (same as the saturday before) and had another barrage of thoughts about eating a dirty burger.  Grumpf!

Which leads me onto the next bit.

I am really worried about trying to keep my healthy eating from Lent on after Lent ends.  Each years after it is over, I just eat what I want, and Keep Lent as Lent.  However, this year I genuinely want to keep eating good normal healthy food.  But there is a problem.

Since Wednesday I have found myself to be contemplating the end of Lent a lot.  It's as if my body knows the mandatory 40 days and 40 nights have been fulfilled and what am I still doing on this ludicrous fast!  I am starving myself a lot more almost in an attempt to make bad food seem like the only option again, if that makes any sense.

I'm not starving myself on purpose, it's just I seem to be able to go for a very long time without eating because nothing is grabbing my appetite.  Even when I do cook food for myself and eat it, it seems tasteless and I get nothing out of it.

Now, I know his isn't exactly the best thing that I could be doing, but the thing is I'm not consciously doing it, It's just happening.

Yesterday I cooked potatoes, salmon and mushrooms and I enjoyed it abut as much as a plate full of treacle (and I hate treacle).  The only way I can describe it is like if you have a 9-5 job and you have been working 4 months straight and you have a 2 week holiday coming up.  The last few days of the last week you have to work before your holiday, you aren't exactly 'at work' any more and instead, your preempting your wonderful holiday and 14 days of non work activities.

It's a little like that.  I think in all honesty, all I want is a cup of good coffee and be able to use butter in my diet to get rid of the craving, I am just scared I might go mental and devour every fast food place within a five mile radius.

Well, we will see.  I do need to go buy some food as I have little left in the fridge and my fruit rack is a joke (I just ate a banana out of it there now, of which 90% was black goo - I only ate the 10% that wasn't by the way).  So maybe I can entice my mind back into enjoying good food and pretend next Sunday isn't happening so I can continue what this Lent has started for me.